The world lost something with the passing of Betty Ford. For those of us in recovery who care about this issue, Mrs. Ford was not just an inspiration, but a person whose courage and willingness to put her public persona at risk shifted the paradigm on how the disease of addiction is viewed and treated in America.
By standing up, being public and her tireless commitment to advocacy, Mrs. Ford impacted many lives. She will be missed and remembered. Her legacy continues to make the world a better place for those struggling with drug and alcohol addiction and their families. When I heard about Mrs. Ford passing I was with a group of recovering people and what came to mind after the feeling of gratitude for her life was the vacuum. The void left in the leadership needed to effect change when it comes to the way America deals with addictive illness.
What do we do now? Where are we going and who are the people who can help lead us there? In 1978 Mrs. Ford stood up publicly, acknowledged her disease and worked tirelessly to reduce the shame and stigma associated with the treatment of chemical dependency. We have come a long way in 43 years. Today, there is a new frontier that we must conquer; another paradigm that must shift. And that is the way America will view and support those in recovery from active addiction and, in fact, the way the recovery community itself views and supports each other.
In a recent New York Times article David Coleman quotes Maer Roshan as saying,
“The recovery world is now where the gay world was then,” he said. “Back then, there was a still a stigma to saying you were gay. There was a community, but it was mired in self-doubt and self-hatred, and it’s changed considerably. Not just gay people, but the perception of gay people has changed. There’s a lot of secretiveness and shame in the recovery world, too, but that’s changing.”
Mrs. Ford understood the power of those with influence and means to profoundly affect the way broader society looks at things. By standing up publicly and admitting her alcoholism, Betty Ford made it okay for millions of Americans to seek treatment. We need Betty Ford’s brand of courage and leadership when it comes to changing the way recovery from addiction is viewed and treated in broader society. Those of us who have confronted the 800-pound gorilla of addiction are not to be pitied, patted on the head or treated with kid gloves. People ask me all the time if I mind if they drink around me. Or they heap praise on me for what I’ve accomplished. They’re missing the point. Addiction is an illness like any other illness. Nobody congratulates cancer patients for dealing with their cancer. They may comment on the grace or fortitude with which they approach treatment but that’s a different thing. Those in recovery from addictive illness are only different from our fellows in the way that our biology relates to the addictive substances or processes.
Our disease or our recovery need not define us or limit us. When Mrs. Ford stood up and publicly confronted her alcoholism she was the little known wife of the 38th President of the United States. I would guess that there are many more people on the planet who know and have been touched by the work of Mrs. Ford than know who her husband was. This is the example we should follow when it comes to recovery. That, in fact, the millions of folks in recovery walking the planet today can and will have profound affects on all aspects of our society and our world. Many of us have been to hell and back, having emerged with the fortitude and the wisdom such a journey demands. Our experience and attributes are much needed in the world today.
